


you only know you love her when you let her go

by BloodRaven55



Category: RWBY
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Compliant, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff, One Shot, Volume 4 (RWBY), i guess it's, oh there is a hint of, p a i n, this was inspired by the summary of the next part of blake's dc comic so yeah, though so
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-19
Updated: 2019-10-19
Packaged: 2020-12-23 20:30:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21087377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BloodRaven55/pseuds/BloodRaven55
Summary: “You said Adam’s name. You— You begged him to stop. And then you called out for someone named Yang. Blake, who is she?”“She’s— She’s yet another person I hurt.”





	you only know you love her when you let her go

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry, but I'm also not so...

It’s far from the first time that Blake’s woken gasping for breath and drenched in sweat since she arrived on Menagerie, but it is the first time that she’s woken to a cool hand on her brow. To her mother’s voice telling her that she’s safe— that she can relax.

“Blake—”

She can’t do this right now. It’s the middle of the night, her hands won’t stop shaking, and she’s sick of crying over everything that Adam Taurus stole from her. Everything that she had let him steal from her.

“I’m fine,” she says, her voice unsteady but sharp.

“Blake, you were screaming. I’m worried for you.” Kali’s tone is firm, but Blake can’t stand the genuine concern it holds. She’s curious to know how much she might have let slip, though.

“What— What did I say?”

“You said Adam’s name. You— You begged him to stop. And then you called out for someone named Yang. Blake, who is she?”

“She’s— She’s yet another person I hurt.”

“Darling—” Blake can’t help the way she flinches at the pet name, just one more thing that she’s allowed Adam to poison, and Kali course corrects. “—sorry, Blake. Tell me about her?”

Her mother reaches out to smooth some hair away from her forehead, and Blake relaxes under the affection for a few moments before she lies back down, rolling over to face the wall. “Not tonight. Sorry, I just— I can’t. Not yet.”

“Okay,” Kali says, and Blake feels her ears flatten against her head in shame at the disappointment that her mother can’t quite hide. “Okay.”

Blake hears footsteps, then the sound of the door opening and closing, and once she’s alone she curls in on herself, torn between hoping she’ll have a nicer dream of sunshine and golden hair and wishing that she’ll be haunted by him again so that the illusion of happiness won’t break her heart all over again.

* * *

Kali is boiling the kettle when Blake goes downstairs the next morning, brewing their morning tea to go with breakfast, and Blake hesitantly takes a seat at the table, piling some toast and eggs onto her plate. The sun is already high in the sky, and she realises that she must have slept in longer than she intended.

“Is dad already working?”

Kali turns to look at her over her shoulder, surprise giving way to sympathy. “Yes, he disappeared into his office about an hour ago.”

Blake nods, and her mother moves to the table to hand her a steaming mug of tea. It’s her favourite—lemon and ginger—and she sips at it carefully, trying not to burn her tongue this time. She feels bad for pushing Kali away last night, but she also doesn’t know how to fix things. She’s been gone so long— how can she ever reform the bond she used to have with her parents?

But she remembers what Sun said. That by shutting people out she only hurts them more. And she knows that she needs to put and end to it. Maybe this can be where she starts.

“Mum,” she says, and Kali sits down opposite her, an almost hopeful expression on her face. “I think I’m— I think I’m ready to talk. About Y-Yang. And Adam.” Kali reaches across the table to take her hand, and Blake gives it a gentle squeeze. “She was my partner at Beacon. And when the school fell, Adam— Adam took her arm. He took her arm because I love her. So I had to leave. She can’t get hurt again because of me. She _can’t_.”

Kali stands and moves round the table to sit next to her, and Blake leans into her mother’s side, allowing herself a moment of weakness. She knows she had no choice, but she _misses_ Yang. And Ruby and Weiss. But where their absence are a dull ache the place where Yang should be is absence is a gaping wound, and it _hurts_.

“What’s she like?” Kali asks, and Blake tries to find words big enough to describe what her partner means to her.

“She’s warm, and kind. And so, so selfless. She never puts herself first. I didn’t want to get close to anyone, but it happened anyway. She was just there, beautiful and strong and radiant, and I couldn’t help it. She was sunlight when all I could see was shadow. And I tried—_I tried so hard_—but she was so gentle and s-sweet.” She buries her face in her mother’s shoulder, letting the sobs wrack her body as the guilt wells up all over again. “If I didn’t l-love her so much then he never would have hurt her. B-But I let it happen—”

Kali shushes her softly, pulling her into a proper hug, and Blake knows she doesn’t deserve it but she can’t reject it. “Blake, you didn’t _let_ anything happen. Whatever Adam did was his choice, and he doesn’t get to blame you for it.”

She rubs Blake’s back soothingly, and it does help, but it can’t erase his voice poisoning her every thought— reminding her of every mistake she’s ever made. “I want to believe you,” she says, and it’s the most she can manage.

* * *

“So,” Blake begins, nervous around her mother for the first time in years because Yang is the woman she’s going to spend the rest of her life with and what if Kali doesn’t like her and—

“I love her,” Kali interrupts before Blake can even ask the question. “And I’ve never seen you so at peace.”

Her mother smiles, and Blake leans in to hug her tightly, blinking back tears but feeling a smile of her own form. “Thank you,” she whispers.

“You don’t need to thank me,” Kali tells her, voice so warm and safe that for an instant Blake feels like a child again. “All I want is for you to be happy, Blake.”

The answer comes as easily as breathing. “I am happy.” Blake grins, feeling more confident of her mother’s reaction to what she’s about to say now that she knows Yang has Kali’s approval. “Which is why I’m going to ask her to marry me.”

As she predicted, her mother is _more_ than a fan of the idea and insists on knowing all of the details, but Blake doesn’t mind. It shows her that Kali cares, and it’s a constant reassurance that everything good in her life—her family, her friends, her hopefully soon-to-be wife—all of it is wonderfully real.

**Author's Note:**

> Well look at me actually being somewhat prolific with my fics again. Anyway hope y'all enjoyed. Any comments apart from non-constructive criticism are more than welcome as always and I'll see you next time :)


End file.
